A Travellerspoint blog

The night before

Sore throat and mental numbness

So we're sat in Irlam at Lauren's Mum and Dad's home, watching Celebrity Big Brother, melting into the sofa and counting down the hours to our imminent advensha.

Tomorrow morning we'll be on our way to Manchester airport, over-packed bags in tow and realisation setting-in (hopefully).

Lauren has been struck down with a steadily-worsening sore throat today; which I strongly suspect is anxiety manifested.

I am currently ailment free but feeling oddly numb about everything that's happened and is about to happen.

In the past 6 months, I've abetted all of these "big" changes in my life; a drastic haircut, premeditated unemployment and technical homelessness and of course a half "gap year" around the world's largest continent.

Anyone would expect a level of apprehension, fear, nervousness, excitement, regret, anxiety, enthusiasm or, at the very least, disbelief and denial.

The only overriding feeling I have at the moment lack of feeling. I couldn't even accurately describe it as apathy. I just feel numb.

I've gone back and forth on whether this is a positive or negative thing and for the time being, I'm just accepting it. There's no point having emotional expectations or putting additional undue pressure on myself. I am just hoping I don't have some sort of meltdown after we've arrived!

We've done our last bit of re-packing, we've organised our money, our travelling outfits, our hand luggage, our paperwork and our minds as best as we can.

The day has been filled with goodbyes, in person, on the phone and on this internet thing. So our duties are, as far as we can tell, fulfilled.

It all starts tomorrow. Wish us luck.


NB: Excuse the bad quality photo - it was taken on my laptop's inbuilt webcam in relative darkness.

Posted by advensha 14:07 Archived in United Kingdom

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